Hmmmmm, what to blog about now?

What the hell people? I’m running out of topics, and the four of you that read this aren’t much help. I guess I’ll start by saying that I don’t believe in God. I generally capitalize it out of respect for those of you that do. I’m not saying God doesn’t exist, I just have a hard time buying into it. It’s not just God, because I don’t believe in any other deity either. I do believe in people and humanity though, and I try to follow the ten commandments as much as possible.(Well, five to ten anyhow.) On the other hand, I don’t care what you believe in, as long as it doesn’t hurt anybody. You can have faith that Rumplestiltskin is the creator of the universe if it makes you feel happy.

That's Jesus

I do feel quite a bit of contempt for religious zealots however. It’s one thing to believe in something that comforts you, but quite another to shove your beliefs down someone else’s throat. I should clarify that I’m mostly talking about children here. It’s fine to send your kids to Sunday school while their little sponge-like brains can soak in Jesus and all of the beautiful stories of love, wine and fishing, but for the sake of the human race, don’t beat the Lord into them and make them afraid to be kids. When they get to whatever age is reasonable, give them the choice. Don’t tell them that they will be punished if they don’t believe in God or Allah, or whatever the Scientologists pray to. Love them unconditionally like a good Christian, Jew or Jehovah’s Witness should. Jesus would want it that way.

While we’re on the subject of religion. LEAVE THE FUCKING GAYS ALONE! I cannot stress enough that they are humans too. I’ve dissected some of their elders and they are the same as us inside and out. (Except maybe for Nazis) I know a few homosexuals of both genders, and am proud to call them my friends. What does it matter to you who they love and why they love them? I actually met a couple not too long ago that almost turned me gay, with their happiness and love for everyone.(Just kidding folks, I don’t think that’s on their agenda, but I’d make a pretty good bear I twink.) Anyhoo, just lay off them, treat everyone with respect until they prove undeserving, and you’ll be surprised how many good friends you will make.

They love each other and that's beautiful

While we aren’t on the subject of bullying, I’d like to ask you to not bully people, and if you have kids, please teach by example that everyone deserves a chance in life. Think about how much of a nerd you are, and what it would be like if everyone you knew teased you about it, maybe knocked you down a few times calling you fatty four eyes and then stole your sandwich because your mom makes the best homemade jam in the township. Sorry, I might have drifted away there. Anyhow, unless they are Nazis or KKK, I don’t think you should be picking on anyone.

Stupid Nazis

Your mom’s pretty hot,


P.S. Sorry if I offended any Nazis with this post.


Filed under Humor

8 responses to “Hmmmmm, what to blog about now?

  1. Stacey

    Ok, I’ll comment. Blog more about your adventures at camp. Or how about jumping into step-parenting with both feet. A mans point of view on the nuptual planning? Whatever you write, we’ll keep reading. Funny stuff:)

  2. Birdman's Right Hand Man

    I’m pretty sure that if there is a God, he/she doesn’t believe in you either! Don’t let it get you down, I know you and I’m not to sure if I believe you exist!

    Peace Out

    • therealbirdman

      Oh, I exist pal. It’s just that I jump between planes of reality. That’s how I get from Multilin to Woodlore so fast. Thanks for the comment, that gave me a chuckle.

  3. Elizabeth

    I think your Blog is awesome! I look forward to reading it every day! Write about how much fun we all had working at Amanda’s when it was on Division St. How we would drink till 3am, grab a couple hours sleep and be back in to serve Bacon And Eggs for 7am! All without throwing up, and likely still a little drunk! Give us some of your adventures at Copperfields, always a good time! How about growing up out in the boonies? What were the local like in Harwood? Need more ideas???

    • therealbirdman

      Thanks EAW, we did have a lot of fun then, but unfortunately I don’t remember much about the late drunk nights. I’ll try my very best to do you proud. Thanks for reading.

  4. Thank you for the shout out to gays!!!

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