I have just learned of Shakeweights, but can’t afford them

Well the day finally came. We are now gainfully employed again, for at least two days, anyhow. We get to run a steamer, and wash off the road signs all along the Farrell Creek, Core, and Beryl Prairie roads. It should be a pretty skookum gig for a couple of suave motherfuckers like Chin and I, but you never know what’s going to happen in the patch. I figure that I’ll drive, and Chin can blast the signs from the passenger side, or maybe we can harness him into the side door, like a gunner in a helicopter. Either way it’s going to look cool, and not get us in hot water with any safety dudes. It’s going to be cool, because we’ll be working right near Hudson’s Hope, and be in camp, so we can get our laundry done, stock up on non-perishables, and shower together, because it’s a little awkward doing that at Aaron’s. When you’re at camp, everybody showers with somebody else; it’s the buddy system. I wish we weren’t in 3’x3′ stalls, but it’s better than being too far away from each other. Chin’s the best back washer I’ve ever had. (Sorry Baby, but you are a bit lacking in that department lately.)

Hey, have you guys seen the Shakeweight Commercials? I fell in love with them instantly last night and wanted to try them, but can’t afford the easy payments, so I did what any determined, poor boy would do. I improvised.

As you can see, we are working on a fixed budget, but one day our ship will come in… our friendship that is. If any of our friends are good videographers that work for free, please contact us about some really fun ideas that we have. Well, I assume it’s “we” anyhow. It can’t just be me that has wonderful ideas about funny things, can it? I didn’t think so.

I’m sorry for the short post today, but it’s 11 PM now, and I have to get up at 4:30 or so, and I still have shit to pack. No, not Chin’s. I think I’ll let him drive into town, and maybe I can sleep. I doubt I can, but you never know; a little morphine goes a long way.

The kid is hot tonight, yeah, so hot tonight, but where will he be tomorrow,

Birdman

16 Comments

Filed under Birdman, Humor

16 responses to “I have just learned of Shakeweights, but can’t afford them

  1. sue

    So nice to see you are still wearing the blue velour shirt…….have you been wearing it this whole time or did you actually take it off and wash it?

  2. Dianne

    Didn’t have time to watch it at home so checked in out when I got to work, but forgot my speakers were on very loud! Needless to say, a few of my office mates also got a laugh! You are in the wrong business my friend, you should consider starring in late night infomercials. You sold me on the peanut butter!

  3. Dustin(Formely Vette)

    So funny and so disturbing at the same time.

  4. Alice

    Wow. I may never be able to erase these images from my mind. Funny though ! Thanks.

  5. Chin

    I’m still recovering from having to film it!

  6. therealbirdman

    All y’all can come and get a free hug when I see you next. Not you though Chin, you crossed a line last time.

  7. Pat Bird

    I really needed the laugh. Even if I am your Mother, that was funny. I also liked that Chin thought it was funny too. He laughs with the same wheeze I have.

  8. Dustin(Formely Vette)

    P.S.

    Love the popped collar!! You go girl!!

  9. Scotty P

    You’re a machine Birdman! Look at you go!

  10. Now THAT was some funny shit, my friend! Although, for some reason, your speech pattern was eerily reminiscent of “Randy” from Trailer Park Boys….lol. Hope all is well Birdman 🙂

  11. Brad Rose

    Birdman; Would it surprise you if I told you that I have a velour shirt too?
    Mine is silver, long sleeve with big Elvis lapels….It’s so rockin’ even Ricky Martin is jealous….
    With that shirt and that shakin’ – you should be in the sequel to Cocktail with Tom Cruise….
    Stay safe and run if you hear banjo music.

  12. Brad Rose

    Pretty lame joke about Cocktail and Tom Cruise…..I was going to go with a Michael J. Fox reference, but decided it would be in bad taste.
    C-word.

    • therealbirdman

      I’m more like Don “No Soul” Simmons, and you’re damn right I believe you have one. You are a swingin’ dick, just like me.

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